Growing up

I am acutely aware of the limited time left with all 5 of us under one roof. And I'm clinging to it for dear life. As much fun as it is to watch our kiddos grow up, it's slightly heartbreaking at the same time. 

Sure, there are moments (frequently) of bickering, arguing, teasing and crying. But I just know that I will miss that noise when it's gone. And the constant song and dance in the kitchen click for a preview

I'll miss turning a corner in the house and seeing a teenager (staring at her phone). Or hearing the humming of the refrigerator while the doors are wide open while listening to someone complain "there's nothing to eat in this house" and shut the door in a huff. Or wonder where all of our cups are when the cupboards are empty, only to discover them divided between the girls' rooms.  

And I am sure to miss the long drives to practice, blasting music and singing to songs from the 1980's, 90's and now, shocked that Regan knows the words to all of those songs from long ago. (thank goodness there are 2 more to keep driving after Regan can drive herself!).

But I'm excited to see these kiddos grow and mature. To watch them hold adult conversations, advocating for themselves and finding their way through life. Because they are all amazing humans who I adore so much. 

Happy 14th Birthday Regan!

Fourteen years ago, this little girl made her debut. She arrived 4 weeks early, unable to feed normally so we used a dropper, but with a set of lungs to let us know she was ready for the world. 

And she hasn’t stopped talking since! 

 

I was blessed to be a mom for the very first time, and in the blink of an eye, now 14 years have gone by. 

 

 

 

It’s so very hard to believe. So slow, yet oh so quick. There really is some truth to the saying “the days are long but the years are short”. 

 

 

Our adorable, chubby cheeked girl is growing up right before our eyes. 

She has an immense love for animals (particularly llamas and dogs), a giant heart that cries crocodile tears of sadness and an uncanny ability to talk and talk and talk. :) She is athletic and adores sports:, long distance running (no sprints!), dance and her absolute favorite is softball. 

 

 

Beyond everything, she is social. Every single school conference since kindergarten, we are reminded that she loves to talk. I cringe because since the 5th grade, she learned how to be social, while getting her work done at the same time. It’s a fantastic life long skill, but one that most of her classmates have still not yet mastered, and as such, can be distracting to them. She easily makes friends, always trying to help the new kids. She floats around, having all sorts of groups of friends. Her coaches and teachers clue us in that these traits (though challenging at times), make her a true leader. And those comments make me proud :) 

 

 

 

 

 

Her most recent realization has been that she will graduate high school in just 4 short more years. While this life event is so very exciting, she cried those crocodile tears when she did the math and discovered Lincoln would still be in elementary school. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that her math was off, and he would actually be younger than she calculated. Her fear is he will forget her, she’ll become a stranger that shows up on holidays....(we are a tad dramatic over here!).  But I secretly cried right along with her. If 14 years went this fast, imagine how quickly the next four will go. So my advice to her, keep making memories, don't hide behind those screens, and your siblings will always remember their fun big sister!

 

I’m hanging on to every moment over here. Clinging to this sweet girl who drives me batty with her eye rolls and general lackadaisical attitude. This sweet girl I love so fiercely! 

Happy 14th birthday baby girl!

 

Ahhh! A teenager! Happy 13th Regan

Our sweet, emotional, adventurous, oldest child is now a TEENAGER!
And I can hardly believe my eyes. 

Oh that sweet face with a big pouty lip is now a teen. 

She still loves to try new things, generally one with little fear. 

Certainly not afraid of heights, or falling. 

In fact, she recently told me she wanted to try out for several softball clubs this fall. When I asked why those particular clubs, she confidently said because she wouldn't be following the masses. 

Oh and she is definitely giving us a run for our money.
She has one heck of an eye roll, an enormous temper (and we thought 4 year olds were challenging) and some not so kind words when she's really angry. 

I know this is a phase, and the teen years are tough. We love you to pieces Regan, and wish you a very Happy 13th Birthday! 

Growing up

If you’ve never heard of Finding Joy by Rachel Martin, you need to look her up. I happened upon her website/blog sometime ago, and every once in a while, I slow down and take the time to read (and subsequently cry) over the words laid out in front of me. I recently had one of those nights. 

As I scrolled through my Facebook feed, I glanced at the words written. Powerful and tragic, I paused for moment..... 

“They grow. Oh sometimes it's subtle and sometimes it's crazy. A change here, some bravery there, but they don't stay small. They stop needing to hold your hand across the street and find friends and do daring things and read and grow up. The clothes are donated, the play food let go, the training wheels discarded, the new freedoms of growing up gained.”

Oh those words tugged hard at my heart strings. Yes, for all of our kiddos as we donate toys and clothes and Lincoln quickly learned to ride without training wheels. But mostly because it was only last week that I reminded Ryan we have just 5 more summers left with Regan. F.I.V.E.  

Here she’s 5 days old. 

5 years old. 

And 5 more years old. 

How on earth do the years slip by so quickly?

Tears streamed down my face tonight as I continued reading: 

"And then one day, they close the door and it is the last time..... Oh don't get me wrong-it will always be home....Maybe we don't talk about that space-that growing up, letting go space-when our homes, instead of becoming noisier, become the opposite. 

Quiet”. 

By this point I was pretty much sobbing. Maybe it's because we are embarking on a new school year, maybe it's because I have coworkers with college age (or older) kids that remind me daily to embrace this time because it goes too fast. Or maybe it's because I recalled that conversation reminding me that it won’t be long, and she’ll be the one heading off to new adventures. 

"Letting go is the deepest love of all". Thank goodness we don't have to let go quite yet. In the meantime, I’m going to hang on for dear life and remember to enjoy every second. I’m so proud of who these kiddos are becoming, it’s just happening so quickly. 

Firsts that are actually lasts

I read a blog post recently about children growing up. I get sentimental about that topic. Can bring tears to my eyes in a heartbeat. It read "this is just the beginning, the domino that starts a cycle of firsts that are actually lasts". As much as I love to watch my kiddos get older and see them grow up, it pains me to think that all of Lincoln's milestones, are actually the last. Soon we will celebrate the last four-year old birthday. We've already changed the last diaper. Eventually it will be the last first day of kindergarten. And the last first loose tooth. You get the pattern. Might as well pull my heart right out. I love this little boy with all of my heart and adore watching him grow. Simply can't believe he's nearly 4!

School's out!

We wrapped up grades 1 and 4 last week and officially have a 2nd grader and 5th grader. Oh boy, 5th grade is really choking me up. It'll be Regan's final year of elementary school and I can hardly believe it. I honestly remember walking into that (big/scary) elementary school for the first time, praying that they would keep her safe and she would be happy. To think we are about to enter her final year?, it's almost too much. 

first day of school: grade 1 and grade 4

Each year, the school does a 5th grade clap out, and each year, I make it down just in time to observe (ah hem, silently cry in the background, knowing far too soon it will be our turn to participate). Every year there are tears. Every year there is joy. And this year was no different. On the final day of school, Lincoln and I raced down in the rain to watch the clap-out and tears immediately started running down my cheeks. Why?! I don't even really know any of the kids. But I just can't help thinking that those kids are moving on to the (big/scary) middle school and are never going to walk the halls of the safe elementary school again. Insert many tears. It just seems to go so fast. And I constantly remember the quote: The days are long, but the years are short. They sure are!

final day of school as a 1st and 4th grader. 

15 months

Wowzas, this little man is growing up.

He's 15 months already.

FIFTEEN!

Where oh where did that time go...

He has blessed our family in so many ways. And we love him to pieces.

Just this morning, the girls were fighting over who got to put on his jacket and hat to walk out the door. He is loved that much. And now that Sidney has figured out how to pick him up (yes, she carries him around even though he's at least half her size), she loves having her "baby" to coddle. And she pouts that she can't hold him like we could when he was a wee baby.....I have those same feelings Sidney and I know Regan feels the same.

At 15 months he is busy. And so much more mobile, the boy is into everything.

That is not an exaggeration.

Ryan has been noted more than once to grumble loudly at the mess created by this lovely 15 month old. And I am quick to announce that he has been declared our "bull in a china shop". My goodness can this kid make a disaster in 2 seconds flat! He will plow through neatly arranged Barbie set-ups, school papers and kitchen cabinets and literally tear them apart without a care in the world. 

But we wouldn't change our life for a second. His quick smile, deep giggle and emerging vocalization is enough to make your heart melt and forget all about the mess. 

Here's a little snapshot of what he does at 15 months: 
* Sleeps terribly, after being hit in November with a respiratory virus, his sleep pattern went downhill and has never really gotten better. He goes to sleep in our bedroom (in his own bed), but will wake a few hours into his slumber with a mega fuss and insist on being held, or moved into our bed. Judge as you may, but we do what works for us and at that point in the night, sleep is our priority. 
* Eats like a champ. Mostly fruit but also appreciates whatever else we will hand him. But when he's done, he's done. And everything left on his tray will be thrown with his left hand across his body and land on whoever is sitting to the right of him (sorry Sidney, this happens to be where you pick to sit at our dinner table). She recently pushed her own plate of food away declaring to be done after Lincoln launched a noodle at her and it landed on her plate...yea, she was finished :) 
* Speaking of throwing, he's a South Paw by every definition. 

* Loves being outside. It's winter, and often cold. But that hasn't stopped him, he loves being outside. I know, I know, I'm the parent and could just bring him inside. But I have to agree with him that being outside (even in the cold) is much preferred over being inside. Fresh air does us so  much good. So each day when we get home, I'm prepared to stand around outside for a while as he walks around, waves at the busses and begs to go in his red car or sled. 

* Still likes to splash in the tub. When the water turns cold, he pulls the plug but stays in until the water is gone. Silly boy will just sit and grin at me.

* Can sign "more", "water", "all done" and "please"....oh boy does that "please" really get to my heart. 

* Can say "mom", "dad" and "hot". Just tonight he told me "moo" when we were reading about cows. 

* Loves to dance, or rather be held while I dance. Many nights over the last week, I have danced him to sleep. And it's our favorite time of the day. He walks over to the music and I know the drill. I will with him in my arms for hours, and he lets me. We sway back and forth and I'm certain the neighbors think I'm crazy dancing all evening with this sweet boy. Our home can feel like a fish bowl sometimes.
* Still wears size 3 Pampers and has gone up to most all size 18 month clothing.

* This week, he got yet another ear infection. Other ear as the one 3 weeks ago. Only a matter of time before we go for ear tube surgery take 2.
* He weighs 24 lbs 12 oz (which is up just one ounce from his one year appointment) putting him in the 77%tile.
* Height is 32" putting him in the 78%tile

He's our favorite one year old around and we couldn't love him any more if we tried. 

But we will try anyway. 

The middle

Being the middle child has got to be tough. You're not the baby and you aren't the biggest. So you aren't the one everyone thinks is cute and cuddly. And you aren't the one who gets to do big-kid things. But it's a good thing Sidney is so stinking cute and pretty darn mature (most of the time). She's surviving being "the middle", and doing quite well.

This summer, she's been able to go on field trips daily with her summer program (she attends 3 days/week and it just happens to be that all the trips are on her 3 days!). She thinks it's soooo cool to ride the bus, sit with friends and explore all that these cities have to offer... with her friends!

Last weekend, one of her awesome friends invited her along to see a movie. Now this was a first in her book. Not going to the movie, we do that frequently. But going with a friend (and her dad). Boy was she excited! Too bad they also invited Regan, that rained on Sidney's sweet parade. Alas, they had fun.

This middle thing has her teetering between not understanding this big world yet and yet trying to keep up with all that Regan does. Sid makes statements that continue to make us laugh like "what are we doing tomorrow tonight?...wait, that doesn't make sense." and  "I can't swim with a loose tooth"; her very first tooth is just starting to wiggle and she swore it would fall out in the pool. 

And then she is sweet and peaceful as she asks me to sit and rock with her before bedtime (ooooh, does that warm my heart). Too bad she gets sassy and mad and you can practically see the steam coming out of her ears when she storms off, upset that she sassed too far and is being sent to cool off.

Oh our sweet Sid, you are rocking this whole middle child thing and there's no one else we'd rather have as our middle. We love you!

Height

Regan's got some height on her.

She really always has, pushing the 90th percentiles throughout her 8 years. Recently though it's become more apparent just how tall she is. Doesn't help that her bestie is no taller than Sidney. When Katie comes to play, she borrows Sidney's shoes and clothes.

But then I noticed that Regan is going to quickly catch up with one of her favorite cousins...

 

It won't be long and she'll be stealing my shoes too! She's into a size 3 already and so proud!

Slow down that growing up, my sweet first born baby girl.