Some day I will want to look back at these months to remember what it was like to be in the thick of it. To have so many balls in the air that it seems at any moment things will come crashing down.
I thought it would be interesting to do a quick run down of a typical day. So here we go:
I wake up early to start work before the rest of the house even wakes. My morning routine and commute are super fast since I thankfully work from home now. My friends joke that I watch Netflix in 10 minute increments while I get ready in the morning; sad but true.
Lincoln is up early shortly after me, chatting and loud as his usual routine. He is just so loud! He's up even earlier these days, excited to see what that sneaky elf did overnight.
By 8am, I’m fixing Lincoln breakfast while simultaneously calling in to the morning hospital admission meeting. Ryan starts his day and I depart for my morning walk or run depending on the day, calling Grandma Jan to keep me company for a couple of miles and catch up on the last 24 hours. Sometimes I have a 1:1 with a staff member instead, but almost always, I take my morning call on a walk.
At 9am, Ryan or I help Lincoln get on his morning Google Meet with his class; often a bit of arguing happens before we convince him to sign in. He doesn't like school on a tablet :( Sometimes I tries to have a sit-in on the couch, refusing to log in. Eventually we get him online. While he listens to his teacher, we try to get some work done and pray no one screams in the background while I need to unmute to lead meetings. I’m often juggling Sidney crying for one reason or another (wifi goes out, link doesn’t work, she thinks only I can help her with homework), while jostling Regan to ensure she didn’t fall back to sleep after her first meet. Lincoln usually ignores our request to do any schoolwork with one of us sitting directly beside him; and in an effort for us to focus on work, he ends up doing whatever he wants.
Look closely, he asks to hold my hand while he works on the tablet. Annoying and adorable.
We spend the rest of the morning on work meetings, try to help Lincoln get assignments completed. Bear in mind, he is not able to navigate distance learning on his own. There are too many steps, too many tabs, too many distractions for him to be independent.
This is just a small sample of all the extra packets that were sent home for distance learning. Piles and piles of paper.
Somehow the dishwasher gets started and emptied, we tackle Lincoln's school work (with a lot of bribes), he plays outside with the neighbors dog, and eventually feed him lunch. Meanwhile, we get interrupted 4,000 times by the girls, who inevitably need help with school, technology not working, I read another 300 messages from any of the 3 schools and continually am told to add this or that to the grocery delivery list. I spend most of my entire workday on the phone with patients, families and team members, so this multi-tasking is incredibly challenging. I'm quick to hit the mute button when I'm not doing the talking.
Lincoln's distance learning set up
Sid getting some extra help on a math assignment from Regan
Sadly I tend to keep working through lunch these days, a far cry from my usual routine where I used to spend lunch at the gym. Lunch continues with the constant interruptions; Regan just finished up Driver's Ed which was held during the noon hour and she tended to have a lot of questions. By this time in the day, I'm checking in on my volunteer roles. I (stupidly) agreed to manage both Sidney's club softball team and Lincoln's hockey team. These roles require me to send updates to each team, collaborate with coaches, update calendars and answer questions from parents.
We spend the afternoon plugging away at Lincoln's assignments. Technology problems are constant when we're all trying to work on the same WiFi. Sidney usually sheds several rounds of tears between her coursework, tests or not understanding a lesson. We tag team various parts of the afternoon: Ryan has a call and I shush the kids, or vice versa. Try to get Lincoln outside to play, but he doesn't like to go alone and the rest of us are busy (except to play with the dog). Thankful for Quinn and they go back and forth between our yard and their yard wearing each other out.
Quinn begging for the rest of the family to come out and play too!
By late afternoon, Lincoln is doing whatever he wants: extra screen time, video games while facetiming friends, and talking non stop. He's often bouncing off the walls by this time of day. Girls are finishing homework and moving on to free time: Netflix, facetiming with friends and softball drills. No one wants to think about what to make for dinner and my mind is fried. I'd love to get outside but sadly run out of daylight. Plus there's an endless list of housework to get done, and I need to finish work and move into prepping Lincoln’s schoolwork for the next day (he's enrolled in school so the teacher gives him assignments, but there's always work for me to prep).
In the evenings, we eat, clean up, play games (daily dose of Sorry!) and wind down. I'm generally completely exhausted. I feel flakey, inconsistent, tired easily, creatively blocked and suddenly don't seem to have as much driving force for future-based goals. Recently I read a message from a professional psychologist/certified coach that put this pandemic time in perspective. The shortened version: "Your plans, creativity, energy, focus + motivation are on a Yo-Yo right now, because your brain believes you need to be extremely adaptive. You will not be on this rollercoaster forever. Be patient with your brain".
I usually unintentionally fall asleep on the couch, physically and mentally exhausted. We're grateful for our health, we're doing all we can to stay home and truly trying to make the most of it. It is not lost on me that this could be so much worse. We are grateful to have jobs and each other. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be sad and mourn the things we miss. And oddly enough, I know that when this is all over, I will likely miss all this together-time!